Well that was a wee bit of a blog lull over these last few weeks. Thing is, its not that nothing happens or that there is nothing to say, but lulls do often mean something is brewing, or forming, or simply waiting.
I don’t know which it is.
I carry around with me at the moment a sense of intense waiting, leading me to some deep silences. I’ve purposefully been taking a more ‘contemplative stance’ to life partly in order to be more ‘in my body’ than ‘in my head’. Also, I readily confess that I find it easier to be in God’s presence in the stillness than any other way.
It probably won’t surprise you to learn that the thing I hold before God most is what he is calling me to. Not really in the place specific sense, but the bigger picture. This is what comes from many years of having one’s identity closely tied to a human organisation…institutionalisation! What I’m left with, before God, is a call to disciple and yes, even to inspire. Might sound big headed, but I’ve been most humbled by the way God has used my story and life to encourage others on the way. I hope that will always be so.
These recent months have been a resubmission…maybe not the right word…but definitely a realignment. A process of choosing what God has chosen for me and to be at home in it. There is no better place to be than headed in the general direction that God seems to fit us for. I have a fairly open view of the ‘will of God’ but do believe there is nothing better than getting to a place of being engulfed with the desire to honour him in every way. This, above any specifics, is his will for us.
After a long journey round the houses, here I am back at a simple passion to make disciples, help others grow in Christ, and to make a difference and see the Kingdom come. There is no improving on that, really. So yes, so many things unknown, unclear and probably to you as readers so contradictory. I can assure you there are none as surprised as me.
When you wade in with God to the extent your feet lift off the floor of the riverbank, his current can then carry you to where you need to go in the way you need to get there. The key is to get into the water in the first place and dare to trust the river that flows from under the throne of God, out into the world, where it becomes a source of life and healing, nourishment and transformation.
As the great poet/philosopher/novelist/ Wendell Berry says
“there are no sacred places. There are no secular places. There are only sacred places and desecrated places.”
Ultimately, we’re called to transform just where we are as we seek God’s Kingdom where we’re planted.