Oh dear, oh dear…the bloggin standards are slipping! Note to self: thou shouldst bloggeth more often.
Today is the 25th of May. It is exactly two years since I signed my officers covenant. This covenant has had strength. It has kept me, urged me on, delighted me, blessed me simply because God is keeping his side of the deal of returning his equipping to me.
The fruit of two years ministry? Well, its there but not sure its what it could have been. I guess there is some fruit I may never know.
When I signed my covenant at the mercy seat in the Assembly Hall at the college, it wasn’t like I expected it would be. Yes, there was that sort of final consecration type thing, but I wasn’t as emotional as I thought I’d be. In fact, although this was the ‘arrrival point’ to which I’d been heading for 7 or 8 years, the excitement I though would be there wasn’t.
Rather, I had an overwhelming sense of humility that God had granted me this opportunity, as I am sure many an officer can testify to. There is no better job in the world (even although it comes with a fair load of stuff to deal with!).
I openly confess, however, that I find it difficult to work out my covenant in the context I am in. I’ve never denied that we have been called to Pill for a special purpose, but I have also never denied the fact that I feel called to the city or to the large town. Its a God thing. It has always been there, I can’t shake it.
Ever since I was a young teenager (around 15), every week, mostly on my own, I’d spend my pocket money on some tins of soup and some bread and I’d get the 40 minute train to Glasgow and find me some people to eat, chat and pray with. During ministry at Dennistoun I was involved in street work and at training college I was on the team that used to patrol Soho talking to the bouncers and girls on the doors and to the guys camped out in doorways.
I miss my people! I miss the council estate. I am not really much good at being ‘The Officer’ in the kind of culture we have in Pill where the clergy are a breed apart, where you have to wear your false face and your cloak of respectability. I don’t fit in there, and I don’t try.
Its that time when we think and pray if we should be moving on. Come the end of the year the DC will probably be having the discussion with us…should we stay or should we go. What I want most is God’s will. Ultimately, it has been his choosing to send us here and it will be his to keep us here or move us on.